


Snowed In

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Enemies, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, Sex, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 23:36:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13258974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: This is the child of two different prompts - so I hope I did it justice and I'm sorry it's late!!Harry and Louis have been friends for years, attend Uni together, and something changes. They stray from one another in friendship, learning things about themselves that the other doesn't know. When they come back together, however, they realize how foolish they've been.





	Snowed In

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hurricanephi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hurricanephi/gifts).



Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson have been the best of friends since attending secondary together. Louis moved to Cheshire after his father passed away and his mother met someone new. It was a hard time for him, being only fifteen and in the middle of year 10, but Harry was his tour guide on his first day and the rest was history. 

Louis had thought Harry a bit weird when they first met, and still did if he was being completely honest. The boy had longer hair - even longer now - was always trying to be fashionable outside of school, and had dabbled in using nail polish and more feminine scents. None of that mattered to Louis because Harry was one of the warmest people he had ever met. He immediately took a young Louis under his wing and introduced him to all of his friends and to a new way of looking at the world.

Fast forward a few years later, Louis and Harry lived in a shared flat together. The pair decided to have separate rooms, but instantly fell in love with their flatmates and became a foursome to be reckoned with. They each had their niche within the friend group. Harry was opening everyone’s mind to gender and sexuality as he pushed the boundaries outside of societal norms, bringing these thoughts into his music and performance. Louis was a non stereotypical job, getting a footie scholarship and making everyone play a game when weather allowed, and FIFA when it didn’t. Liam was always getting philosophical, often times joining Harry in hours of deep conversation about the universe and the world. Zayn was an artist in every sense of the word: passionate, intense, broody, and perfect for Liam on days when he became to wrapped up with everything inside his head. They had been together since the first week of uni, everyone seeing the way they looked at each other from day one. Lastly was Niall, the comedic relief and human trash can of any extra food that was sitting around. He was there to keep everyone in check and force them to go out on nights that no one had any energy. Niall was the energizer bunny. Even though they were all different, the boys all had similar interests and values when it came down to it. They each taught one another about life in a certain way, and came from such different backgrounds that they were learning more about the world each day.

***

“Hey, lads! Anyone in?” Louis’ voice rang throughout the flat as he clamored in from an indoor footie practice. The weather was getting a bit nippy outside, and his other team mates were too fragile to practice in the cold. Louis had something to say about that, but he merely shrugged it off and played his best indoor football game yet. He was on cloud nine.

A sleepy sort of sound came from the next room over, where Niall was either sleeping or eating 90% of the time. “Nialler?” Louis asked.

A low sniffle came from behind the door as Niall opened it, revealing the blonde with bed head and perhaps a stuffy nose. “I’m barely alive.” He muttered, blowing his nose into a tissue.

“Too bad! We’re going out tonight!” Louis shook his friend by the shoulders before running a hand through his sweaty hair.

Niall perked up at that. “The Tommo? Going out on a school night?” He asked, eyebrows raising into his hairline.

Louis rolled his eyes. “C’mon mate, I’m showering and then we’re going to The Bulldog to celebrate how amazing I am.”

“Oh is that all?” Niall asked, watching as Louis stripped nearly naked in their living space. “Put some clothes on man, no one wants to see that!” He shut his door, telling Louis he’d be ready in a few minutes.

In true Tomlinson fashion, Louis was late getting out of the shower. Meaning he’d be late fussing with his hair and late to the time Zayn mentioned stopping by The Bulldog before he and Liam took off for the holiday break. They were spending time at both families houses, and as all of their finals were done, they were able to leave on a Thursday. 

Niall and Louis showed up thirty minutes past their meeting time, immediately spotting Zayn and Liam up at the bar. They greeted one another with hugs before Louis looked around, confusion on his face. “Where’s Harry?” He asked as the lights dimmed, Zayn opening his mouth, but not having the time to reply before Harry himself stepped on the small beer stained stage. 

There was a bright light on his face, and Louis was certain he saw some glitter in his hair. “What’s he doing?” He whispered, Liam stepping up this time to answer his question. 

“He didn’t tell you?” 

“Tell me what?” Louis glanced up to the stage where Harry was muttering into the microphone, but his heart was too busy pumping in his ears to know what he was saying. He was nervous. Yeah, he was nervous for his best friend.

Liam smiled, putting an arm around Louis’ shoulders. “First open mike for our little baby Harry.” He paused, squeezing Louis’ bicep before letting out a chuckle. “Relax, he’ll be good.”

“Relax? I’m fine.” Louis lied, eyes flitting from Liam then remaining on Harry until the music started.

Harry had never been one to show off or brag about his accomplishments. The boys really didn’t know much until months later - like when Harry set the curve in his human behavior class, or when he had been elected VP of the LGBTQIA+ alliance on campus as a first year student. He liked to do these things, but didn’t necessarily want the recognition and praise for it.

****

Harry’s set was in a word...intense. He had spent a lot of time preparing his songs and the vibe he wanted to put into the room. It was a Wednesday night, after all, and he only was allowed ten minutes which was time enough for three songs at most. He was prepared and looking forward to the experience, but he wasn’t prepared for what happened when he went on stage.

It was dingy and dark as The Bulldog always was, regardless of the time of day or the clientele being served. That’s what Harry liked about the place - it was reliable. What he didn’t expect was who he saw when the lights came back up, after his set. Louis. Louis was all he saw amidst the clapping and low hollers for Harry to perform another song. He looked shocked, perhaps stunned into submission as blue eyes locked with green. Harry could feel a heat rise to his cheeks, said a quick goodbye into the mike, and took off backstage. 

He didn’t invite Louis on purpose. Louis was busy, and he felt like there had been a rift in between them that had been growing for the past year. Sure they still talked in the group chat and saw each other here and there, but Louis was wrapped up in football and had a lot going on in school. It was both of their faults for not communicating as often as they had, but things had changed for Harry as well. He had realized that he wasn’t much questioning his sexuality as he was sure of it. He hadn’t told Louis yet because it never seemed right, and he wanted to make the situation as ideal as possible. Yet here he was, singing a ballad about an unrequited love, and Louis had heard it all, and had no idea who he might be singing about. They use to be so transparent with one another, but something had shifted.

When he finally managed to get backstage, Harry immediately went to the bathroom to splash some water on his face. He had to find some way to calm down and stop his freak out from showing all over his face. Surely Louis would be accepting of this side of him - after all, he had been supportive of all of his gender bending and self exploration in the past. When Harry came out of the bathroom to meet up with his friends, however, he noticed someone missing. Louis.

“Harry that was amazing!” Niall shouted, enveloping him in a hug.

Zayn and Liam were standing together with an arm around one another, Zayn leaning into his boyfriend. “Who knew you were the romantic? Epic stuff, though.” Zayn commented, Liam offering a smile and congratulatory wink.

Harry licked his lips, glancing to the bar, hoping that maybe Louis was still there. No luck.

As if he could read minds, Niall spoke up at that moment. “Louis was here, but he had to take off. Something happened with the footie guys, he said.” Niall explained haphazardly, taking a long pull from his beer. A bit quieter he added “Have you told him yet?”

Running a hand through his hair, Harry shook his head without meeting his friends stare. Louis had been his best friend for years, but he struggled to find the courage to be honest with both of them - about how he felt and who he was. 

Later that night, after Zayn and Liam had called it quits, Niall and Harry were hanging out by themselves. They had enjoyed a lot of solo time together, Niall becoming somewhat of a replacement for Louis when he was busy with footie and other activities. He was a social butterfly, and Harry had learned to let him spread his wings early on. Niall was always there, ready for an adventure or just a chat on what was going on that week. He had been instrumental in helping Harry be honest with himself and what he wanted for his future.

“You’re one of my best friends, you know?” Harry said, his words slurring together amongst the alcohol consumed.

“You’re drunk.” Niall cackled. “But you’re one of mine too, H.” He smiled, finishing off his beer with a final swig.

“Time for sleep.” Harry smiled, laying his head on the sticky wooden table between the pair.

Niall shook his head and smiled at his friend, eventually dragging him up from his sitting position. “Time for sleep, yes. We’ve gotta get you home first.” Niall helped Harry the few blocks to their flat, Harry’s heeled boots clicking all the way back. The irishman helped his friend undress - mostly - before shuffling him into bed and tucking him in. Harry was out before he had the chance to wish him goodnight. Niall shut the door and giggled to himself as he walked into the common space.

“He okay?” A voice in the darkness asked. Niall jumped from the sound and clutched his chest as if he were about to have a heart attack. “Christ man, whatta ya doing up?” He asked, throwing himself down on the couch and letting out a sigh.

Louis stood up at that, lips pursed as he thought for a few moments. “Just making sure you both got back alright. I know how Harry gets when he drinks - dead weight, hilarious dead weight.” 

Niall laughed at that. “He sure is.” He yawned.

“Is he...did…” Louis started, shaking his head as he made his way to his bedroom. He opened the door, pausing for a moment before stepping inside and locking it behind him.

It took Louis several hours to fall asleep that night. He wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol coursing through his veins, the knowledge that Harry was doing gigs without telling his (former?) best friend, or what he thought about his music. What Louis did know was that he was looking forward to going home to his crazy family with each passing minute, needing the distraction of their energy, attitude, and overall activity that came with being home for the holiday. He thought that he and Harry had been close enough that they would tell one another everything - or had at one time…

The next morning, Louis was already gone when Harry woke up. The first thing he did when he dragged himself out of bed was knock on Louis’ door. He knew Lou didn’t have any exams until the afternoon, and was worried he did or said something the night before to upset him. He desperately wanted to tell Louis about his revelation about himself, but was worried his music had spoken for itself.  After giving himself a few moments to ponder his next move, Harry found his phone on the kitchen counter next to a few pills and a glass of water. A guardian angel surely left those for him.

It was only a moment later when his phone buzzed on the counter. Louis.

_ Are you headed to Cheshire for hols? _

The message was simple and something that Harry hadn’t expected. He thought he and Louis had talked about it - Louis debating on going home at all, and Harry certainly going to see his family for Christmas. Harry typed a quick response back, wondering where Louis was and how his exams had been going. It seemed like forever since they had really talked, given that Harry was really wrapped up in his music. 

_ I’m taking the 7:10 on Friday night - did you decide what you were doing? _

_ Mum wants me home for my birthday soooo I’m on the same one. Wanna share a taxi? _

_ That’d be great! And that reminds me, I have a bday present for you :) _

Harry pauses, wondering if he should even keep the last bit. He quickly deletes most of the text, simply sending that it would be great. 

***

Louis had been in the library for hours. He had planned on studying up for exams, but the distraction of wanting to know more about Harry’s life was too great. He had crept on his Facebook and Instagram, not finding anything good before finally deciding to text him about the holiday. Louis wanted to talk to his best friend and wanted to know about what was going on with him, but had no idea how to ask. He stopped the conversation with Harry by not replying, finding it awkward to straight out ask him about why he was left out and what this said to him about the changes in their friendship. He had noticed Harry wasn’t as forthcoming as he used to be, the past few months separating them by what seemed like miles.

He laid his head on the computer desk he was using, letting out a low groan and immediately being shushed by other library-goers. That was why he didn’t go to the library. He never got anything done, and everyone was so stuffy. Not even a groan was acceptable to these students. Of course. 

For a brief moment, Louis thought about going back to the dorms and going to sleep, but he knew that Harry would be there and he wasn’t ready to have a face to face conversation about what was going on with their friendship. He would try and delay that as much as physically possible - and there were plenty of other distractions, what with the holiday and all…

***

It had been another 24 hours and Harry still hadn’t seen Louis in the flesh. This was normal during footie season, but that was over and the pair was supposed to be studying up for exams and hanging out with the other lads before the break. Niall, Harry, Liam, and Zayn were together in the common space, studying for various exams when Liam finally broke the silence, his thoughts finding the need to be out there.

“Has anyone heard from Lou?” He asked, mostly directing his question to Harry, but putting it out to the whole group.

Harry shook his head, the others looking around their makeshift circle. No one had heard much from him since a few days ago - since Harry’s show

“Huh” Niall muttered, sticking a pen in his mouth and chewing on it for a moment. “Is he still seeing...that person from his Comm class?” He asked Zayn, who only shrugged. 

“He’s seeing someone?” Harry asked, curiosity getting the best of him. Since he had known him, Louis really hadn’t dated anyone seriously enough to be *seeing* them. Sure he had the casual hookup or the mention of a failed date here and there, but between football and class, Louis had said he really didn’t have the time or energy to invest in another person. Harry found himself wondering about which girl it could have been. He had a few friends in classes that he spoke about, some that he would go get drinks with after lecture, but none that Harry could remember were that important to him.

As if on cue, Louis burst through the front door of the flat. He clearly hadn’t expected the four of them to be in the common area, given the way he looked when he saw them. The shock was written on his face, but Harry instantly noticed something else. Louis looked terrible. The bags under his eyes were indicative of a severe lack of sleep, his clothes looked like they had been thrown on hastily, and his face - Louis’ face was red and blotchy, as if he’d been crying.

“Lou are you..?” Harry began, but stopped short as Louis rushed past them and into his room, closing the door behind him. Harry bit his lip, venturing a glance toward Niall who was already out of his seat and knocking on Louis’ now locked door. He was whispering into the seam of the frame, hoping that Louis would hear him and come forward. Niall was always the one keeping them together, and had a perpetually positive attitude about life.

After a few minutes, the door to Louis’ room creaked open and Niall was granted entrance. The boys returned to their books, all on a bit higher of alert after that. Louis was rarely able to show more emotion than pure excitement or joy about footie or a friend's accomplishments. They never knew him to be sad or overly emotional about anything - even when the situation called for it. Harry was worried about him. He had only seen Louis cry a handful of times, but they had been younger and the situations weren’t anything like this. 

Niall returned to them an hour later, looking damn near exhausted. “So what’s going on?” Harry asked, setting his own stuff aside to ask about his friend. Despite the change in their friendship, he still cared deeply for Louis and wanted to help in whatever way he could. 

The blonde rubbed a hand over his face. “Mate.” He paused, shaking his head. “You two just have to have a sit down.” He sat on the couch next to Harry, leaning his head back against the wall and letting out a sigh. “You’re more alike than you think - and he needs his best friend back.”

Harry was surprised at that. Both at the bluntness and the truth his statement contained. He was about to say something when Zayn spoke up first.

“So they’re through, then?” he asked, more of a statement than a question. Niall nodded in response, Harry thinking he saw a glance in his direction before he did so. Everything was happening so quickly: Louis was in a relationship, and now he wasn’t. Instead of pushing the topic, Harry let it go and settled back into his text book. His studying didn’t stop him from seeing Louis sneak out of his room to grab a cuppa, Harry recognizing his own oversized purple jumper that Louis had stolen from him years ago. A small smile appeared on his face at that, but he didn’t say a word to anyone about it.

***

The next day everyone in the flat took off except Louis and Harry, who still had a few more exams. Louis briefly came out of his room to say goodbye to Niall, Liam, and Zayn, but quickly retreated back into his dark hole. He was avoiding any and all thoughts about Loren from his Comm class, a relationship that had gone sour more quickly than he had expected. Louis hadn’t dated much but he had a certain talent for fucking things up in the most royal way possible. It had happened with Harry apparently, and now Loren, who was next? Louis flipped his comforter over his head, hoping to catch some sort of sleep before his next exam.

That apparently to be rendered impossible by his intrusive thoughts and a buzzing from his phone. It was Harry, and he was back to using emojis in his texts.

H:  _ I had to leave, but wanted to make sure you’re alright :/ _

Louis typed out a variety of replies before settling on: I’m okay, thanks. Good luck on your exam.

H: _Thanks :) Still on for sharing the taxi tomorrow after exams?_

L: Of course

The bubble popped up stating Harry was typing again, but a few moments later it disappeared. 

L: Were you typing something else?

H: _Just wondering - maybe we can sit by each other on the train and play that game to entertain us._

Louis knew exactly what Harry was talking about without having to ask. They had ridden together to school for years and had always played the same game when coming in contact with strangers. They would each say a sentence about the person's life, and spend time making up stories about them. It would often be something that would dissolve the pair into hushed giggles and red faces. It had been ages since they had played that. 

L: Lol sure why not?

***

Harry considered even the typing of “lol” as a plus when it came to communicating with Louis that afternoon. Sure he didn’t know if he actually laughed out loud or even smiled at what he had to say, but the fact that he typed it was somewhat of a victory for Harry. He decided that night on the train, Harry would finally tell him. He would tell Louis about his sexuality. He would tell Louis about how he had written music to get it all out in the open. He would tell Louis how he didn’t invite him to the show on purpose...and he would tell Louis that he was in love with him. He was in love with him and trying to separate and squash those feelings as to continue being his best friend. He would tell him, and the chips would fall where they may.

***

“I’m gonna do it.” Harry nearly yelled into the phone as he walked back from his last exam. He was headed to the flat, and on the phone with Niall to help him process what was going to happen later that evening.

Niall hooted. “Finally, mate!” He paused. “It’ll feel good not to tiptoe around him, yeah?” He sounded excited.

Harry pulled his coat tighter around himself, the wind whipping through his hair as he tried to shield himself against the it. “I dunno, that’s the thing. What if he completely flips?”

“H, he’s your best friend.” Niall negotiated.

“Was.  _ Was _ my best friend.” Harry paused, letting out a sigh as he finally made it to the dorms, pulling the door open and shuffling inside. When he finally got upstairs to their room, he wasn’t at all surprised to see Louis had passed out on the couch, curled up on the side closest to the heater. He told Niall to hang on for a minute as he made himself a cup of tea and snuck into his room in attempt to let Louis sleep.

“Why are we whispering?” Niall asked loudly over the phone.

Harry chuckled and got into bed, planning to take a quick nap before they had to leave. “Lou is sleeping - and I’m about to do the same.”

“You in the same bed?” He could practically hear Niall waggling his brows.

“Shut up, I’m going to sleep.” He hung up the phone as Niall began to cackle, set his alarm for a few hours later, and passed out.

***

“Jesus fuck….” Louis woke up to the sound of his alarm, clearly not very pleased that it was going off. He pulled the blanket around his shoulders as he stood up from the couch and looked out the window. To say he was surprised by what he saw would be an understatement. Louis had never seen so much snow in his life. “Fucking hell…” he muttered, pulling out his phone and seeing several alerts about transportation. Luckily there was nothing about the train running late or cancelled. Louis breathed a sigh of relief.

“Everything okay?” Louis nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of another voice, releasing a few expletives as he grabbed his chest.

“Harry, Jesus. You scared the piss outta me.” He stated, glancing back down at his phone. “Have you seen what it looks like outside?” He asked, his eyes back on the big window next to the couch.

Harry rubbed a hand over his sleepy face as he walked toward the window and looked outside, humming a pleasant sort of noise. “S’beautiful.” He mused, watching as the snow fell around campus in huge flakes. 

Harry was always seeing the good in everything, Louis thought. Something he was never quite able to do. “Yeah, mate. But how are we supposed to get to the train in this weather?”

“That’s why I came out here. Gems says none of the car transport to the train is running right now.” He pulled out his phone and showed Louis the travel warning. “Too much ice, way to dangerous I guess.” He sighed.

Louis sat back down on the couch, head in his hands. He couldn’t miss his train - he just couldn’t. He had way too much riding on being home. The big family, the noise, the very limited personal time. Usually that was obnoxious but the past few weeks he needed that distraction and chaos. 

Harry paced back and forth, clearly nervous about missing Christmas with his family as well. Louis knew they had traditions that he loved.

***

Harry couldn’t spend any more time alone with Louis than he already was. He felt like he was going to burst at the seams and just unleash all of his pent up feelings at once. If they were stranded together at school, there was no telling what would happen. He was planning on telling Louis about his feelings when they were parting ways at the train station - that way, Louis would have time to process what he had said and decide if he wanted to remain friends or not. If Harry told him and they were forced to spend time together...that might ruin them and not give them a chance to rebuild their friendship.

“I guess it could be worse.” Harry suggested, sitting down on the couch next to Louis. He could smell his cologne and wanted to stay there forever.

Louis looked over at him, brows knitted together. “How? How could this be worse?” He asked, shaking his head.

Harry knew that he and Louis weren’t on the best of terms, but damn it if the other lad couldn’t hang out with Harry for a night while they waited for the travel advisory to lift. “I just meant, at least we have heat and food and things to do.” He could feel his voice getting smaller, and knew that he would never last an extended amount of time around Louis.

***

A few hours later when both boys were resigned to the fact that they were at least staying another night, things became a bit lighter. Harry suggested they make some dinner and play FIFA for a bit - something that Louis really missed about spending time with his (former?) best friend. 

While Harry was wrapped up in his pizza making extravaganza in the kitchen, Louis stepped into his bedroom to make a phone call. He had already told his mum that he wouldn’t be there tonight - Jay being very understanding about the weather, but sad that she wouldn’t get to spend “birthday eve” with her son - but he lied and told Harry that’s who he was going to call. Not that he needed a reason to leave the room.

“Louuuu! How’s the train?” Niall’s voice boomed out over the speaker of his phone.

Louis chuckled at the sound. “Wouldn’t know, mate. Never made it.”

“What? Why!” Niall’s voice changed to a tone of concern.

Louis spent the next ten minutes explaining what was going on, who he was with, and what the hell he was going to do for another 24 hours with Harry when they had barely spent an hour together alone over the past few months. Louis was absolutely dreading making small talk about anything. He felt he barely knew Harry anymore, and he knew that Harry didn’t know him anymore either.

“Calm down, you wanker. Maybe this is good?”

“How come you and Harry both think this is great?”

“He does?”

“What the fuck, Niall. Why is this good?”

“Get to know him again, Christ. We’re all tired of you guys not being close anymore.” 

***

Harry was a bit drunk. Just a bit. Louis had suggested drinking a few beers while they played FIFA. God knew Harry wouldn’t turn them down - he was terrible at FIFA and even more terrible at keeping his mouth shut and eyes controlled around Louis. He really couldn’t help himself. He wanted to reach out and just cuddle his friend like they used to, their bodies so close to one another as they sat on the floor with their controllers. But he knew he couldn’t, not anymore. 

“Hey Harry?” Louis asked, eyes still trained on the screen.

“Yeah?” 

“I have a weird question.” 

“Okay…” Harry was suddenly much more nervous than he was before.

“I just…” Louis started, making his player on the screen run around one of Harry’s. “I just, well...I miss this.” He finally stated, letting out a breath.

A smile instantly came across Harry’s face, becoming mildly distracted with Louis’ statement, which allowed him to score. When Louis scored in FIFA he was always obnoxious, turns out today wasn’t any different.

“GOAAAAAL!” Louis stood up from his seated position, fist pumping the air and taking a final swig of his beer. He really was a sore winner. He wandered over to the kitchen, bringing back a beer for himself and setting another in front of Harry.

“I miss this too, really Lou.” The nickname rolled off his tongue before he had the chance to say anything else. 

Louis turned to him, a small smile on his face. “So my question.” He began, eyes flitting over Harry’s face. “Why didn’t you tell me about your show?” He asked, popping the lid off of his beer and taking a long pull.

Harry sighed, wondering when this was going to come up and formulating a response. “I’m sorry about that, really. I just - well, the songs were really personal...and, well. We hadn’t really talked about anything like that in a while. I didn’t want you to be surprised or whatever.” Harry twisted the bottle cap off of his own beer, taking a swig.

“That you’re gay?” Louis asked matter of factly.

Harry nearly spit out his beer, surprise etched on his face. “What!?”

“Well, you are - aren’t you?”

“I mean. Well, yeah...but how’d you figure?”

Louis rolled his eyes. “I may have been born at night, but it wasn’t last night.” Louis started, setting his bottle down. “I’m not an idiot. I heard you crooning about love and paid attention to the pronouns.”

It was surprising - if Harry was honest - that Louis had caught on to what he had been singing about. Sometimes Harry’s lyrics were convoluted and confusing, not necessarily outright stating he was in love with men, or any man in particular. He wondered if he should lie about it and backpedal, claiming they were just love songs about no one in particular. Definitely not about anyone Louis knew. 

“So who is it?” Louis asked matter of factly, taking another pull from his bottle and arching a brow.

“I...well…” Harry stuttered, not really knowing what to say. He wanted to lie about it, but surely Louis would see past it. “Just some guy I’ve had a crush on.” He explained. It wasn’t a lie, it just wasn’t necessarily the truth.

“Didn’t sound like much of a crush, mate.” He set down the bottle and leaned back against the couch. “How about, if I tell you mine, you’ll tell me yours.” He offered.

Harry thought about it for much too short of a time, desperately wanting to know who Louis had been with that he had clearly been upset about losing. “Ok, deal.” 

***

Louis leaned his head back further on the couch, letting his eyes close as he let the memories wash over him. He had only been with Loren a few months or so, but he still had some strong feelings. After all, it was probably the first serious relationship he had after all this time of hiding who he was from the world. Being athletic and on the footie team didn’t lend itself well to long term relationships, or much other than a one night stand if he were being honest. He had his fill of that, early on. It was getting a bit old, and he had other things on his mind. 

Harry was looking at him expectantly. Right, their deal. What better time than a blizzard than to show your true colors?

“Okay well, how much do you know?” He asked, figuring Niall or one of the others must have blabbed something by now.

Harry looked thoughtful, running a hand through his past the shoulder long hair. It really was a look that worked well on him. “I just know the name Lauren and that you were upset the other day when you came back from seeing her.”

Louis nodded, not completely ready to lay all his cards out on the table just yet. He wanted to give himself and Harry time to adjust to breaking back into their friendship again, and this seemed like the next logical step. 

“Right” he started “Well, yeah. Ehm, I guess Loren and I met in my Comm class…” he trailed off, Harry nodding and stating that he had heard that amongst the guys.

“I didn’t necessarily want to get too involved, but we spent a lot of time studying together.” He paused, not wanting to admit that it was when he and Harry first had a kind of falling out - in that they weren’t as close as they once were. “I think it just gradually progressed from there, you know?” Harry nodded, of course he would understand what Louis meant, he always had a way of reading between the lines with him.

He let out a sigh, carrying on. “So we dated, I didn’t tell many people but there we were, walking to class and all that together. Snuck Loren in the flat a few times to stay at mine, but yeah, then it ended.” Louis finished with that statement, not really caring to elaborate much on that part.

Harry was quiet for a minute as he surveyed Louis, looking at him as if he was looking at some sort of animal in a zoo - trying desperately to figure him out.

“So what happened?” Harry finally asked.

“What do you mean?” Louis was good at playing stupid.

Harry smiled, that dimply thing that always got Louis to tell him what was really on his mind. “Come on, then. Why did you end it?” He asked, nudging Louis as he turned away and leaned back against the sofa. 

Louis was quiet for a long time, several minutes if he had to guess. He sucked in a breath and let it out. “I didn’t end it, Loren did.” He ran a hand over his face, remembering the conversation. The pair had been sat on Loren’s bed, in his flat that he didn't share with anyone else. Louis was apparently going on and on about Harry and his music, though he really only thought he mentioned it once. Loren called him out on it and said he was gone for Harry. Louis tried to dispute that, to make sure Loren knew how much Louis cared about him...but he wasn’t convincing enough. Loren had put the truth between them, and they couldn’t be the same after that. 

“Loren ended it.” he muttered, still a bit heartbroken over the whole thing. He had really cared about him, not to mention he had a good time every time they were together. Though in the end, Loren knew him too well, it seemed. “Said I was too in love with someone else to keep dating me.” It hung in the air between them.

“Well, are you?” Harry looked surprised.

“Deals a deal, mate. It’s your turn.”

***

Harry could barely process the story Louis was telling him, let alone have any good response to what he was saying. Here Louis was, telling him how into this Lauren girl he was, when all Harry wanted to do was cuddle him until he felt better - which okay, may also have been for selfish reasons. Now that he was hearing that Louis was in love with someone, he wasn’t quite sure he could stick to his original plan. Had Niall said he would kill him if he didn’t tell Louis? Or was that just Harry’s mind knowing he should still say what he had intended to say before. He took a deep breath as his gaze flitted up to Louis, his expression one of what appeared to be nervous anticipation. 

“So you know I’ve been writing music forever, yeah?” 

Louis rolled his eyes. “Not sure what that has to do with who you’re in love with, but yeah, go on.” He took a swig from his nearly forgotten about beer. Harry needed a way to take the edge off too, taking a pull from his own bottle. 

“It does, because see...so I had always found it easy to put my feelings into a song. Words always got kind of lost with me.” He paused at Louis’ chuckling.

“You act like I’ve never met you before, Haz.” he waved for him to go on, still chuckling behind his hand.

Haz. The nickname that he hadn’t heard in so long. There it was as if it was nothing. To Harry, it was literally everything. He took pause for a moment, convincing himself that this was a good decision and that maybe their friendship would be stronger because of it. Harry took another deep breath. It would all be okay.

“I found it easier to write. So the past few years I thought I had always been writing poetry, but when I played around with my guitar, I was able to make the words into songs.” He smiled to himself, remembering the first one he had written about his best friend. It was one of the songs he performed the week before, not knowing Louis would be there. “The song I played. Two Ghosts? That one’s about who I’m in love with.”

“Can I hear it?” 

“What?” Harry’s heart was nearly in his throat.

“Can I hear it?” Louis asked again, clear as day.

“Well I don’t have it recorded or anything.”

Louis rolled his eyes for the second time that night. “You have pipes. I’ve heard em.” he paused. “Plus if this person is so special that you’re in love with them, I should at least hear the song again before I know what we’re up against.” 

God Louis had no idea and Harry was walking into this pit of feelings he didn’t know how he would escape from. Singing was never something Harry could hide his true emotions from, and he never wanted to, but with Louis this close to him and them being the only ones in the room - he didn’t know how it would go. That being said, he was never really able to refuse a request from Louis, no matter how much he may not have wanted to.

“Would you like a guitar accompaniment?” Harry joked, though needed a reason to escape to his room to check his phone and do some deep breathing in preparation for what he was about to tell Louis.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.” Louis replied, letting Harry know that he would grab some drinks while he got the guitar.

Harry rushed into his room, grabbing the phone out of his back pocket and seeing a litany of missed calls and text messages. Had he and Louis really been out there playing FIFA and talking for so long? He saw a few texts from Niall, who was his main concern right now.

NH: _Maaaaaaate, what the fucks going on. Zaynie told me you guys were snowed in!?_

NH: _Harry._

NH: _H._

NH: _Harry._

NH: _Okay mate if you don’t answer soon I’m going to assume either you died before telling Louis or that you two are making sweet sweet love right now._

HS: Niall. What the fuck?

NH: _Jesus, finally! What’s going on?_

HS: I think I’m about to tell him.

NH: _What do you mean you think? Come on, Styles! More confidence!_

HS: He wants me to sing for him…

NH: _What?_

HS: Yeah. I haven’t exactly told him the song is about him...and he wants to hear it to see “what we’re up against.” whatever that means.

NH: _Jesus Christ._

HS: Is this a bad idea?

NH: _Nah mate. Call me after, yeah?_

HS: Okay.

NH: _It’ll be great - have faith! That song is kick ass, someone would have to be crazy not to like it - I want a song written about me next._

HS: <3 Of course, anything for you.

Harry gathered up his guitar and headed back out into the living space, sitting this time on the couch instead of on the floor. He noticed two rocks glasses with a brown liquor in them. Harry eyed Louis who picked one up and urged Harry to do the same.

“Figured we might need something stronger dealing with some unrequited love shit. On my end at least.” He smiled, but it wasn’t the sort of big smile Harry was used to. It lacked the Louis vigor, and he instantly felt saddened that the person Louis cared about wasn’t wise enough to feel the same way. They didn’t know what they were missing.

“To unrequited love.” Harry clanked his glass with Louis before taking a sip. Of course it was bourbon, Louis’ favorite. “Mmm with cinnamon. How very festive of you.”

Louis chuckled and shook his head. “Hey now, how do we know your love is unrequited? You’d have to be a right idiot to have someone write a song about you and not feel at least someeeething.” Louis started, causing Harry to blush. He really didn’t have a clue.

“Go on, then. Let’s hear what he’s missing.”

***

The way Harry held his guitar was as if it was something as precious as could be. He watched carefully as his fingers set up the chords that he was about to play. Louis noticed his calloused finger tips and the muscle tensing in his arm as he tuned one of the strings. Harry was something to behold. 

“Okay, I’m gonna start.”

“Thanks for telling me.” Louis laughed. It was a nervous bit of laughter. Something akin to nervousness for Harry bubbled up inside. Probably also a bit of jealousy, if he were being honest.

“Uh, this is Two Ghosts.” Harry said, before starting to strum on the guitar, his eyes closing at the sound of the instrument. He looked so ethereal like that - just at ease and perfect the way he was. Louis stared unabashedly at him, deciding he should keep his comments for the end.

***

Harry could barely breathe, let alone sing, but here he was about to put his heart on the line for Louis. For his best friend. And he was going to sing about it. He never imagined it going this way, and honestly just wanted to zone out and pretend it wasn’t happening, so that’s exactly what he did. As he struck the first chord, Harry shut his eyes and let the emotion flow through his fingertips.

***

_ “Same lips red, same eyes blue _

_ Same white shirt, couple more tattoos _

_ But it's not you and it's not me _

_ Tastes so sweet, looks so real _

_ Sounds like something that I used to feel _

_ But I can't touch what I see _

 

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me _

_ Trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat _

 

_ The fridge light washes this room white _

_ Moon dances over your good side _

_ This was all we used to need _

_ Tongue-tied like we've never known _

_ Telling those stories we already told _

_ 'Cause we don't say what we really mean _

 

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me _

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're just two ghosts swimming in a glass half empty _

_ Trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat _

 

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We're just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me _

_ We're not who we used to be _

_ We don't see what we used to see _

_ We're just two ghosts swimming in a glass half empty _

_ Trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat _

 

_ Trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat _

_ I'm just trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat.” _

The last of the lyrics were out, and Louis wasn’t exactly sure what he was feeling. Regret? Relief? Something completely different. He had set his drink down in the middle of the song, choosing instead to lean back and let the music be all that he thought about while it was being performed. Harry certainly had a wonderful voice, and nothing he said or did could change that - but those lyrics were haunting. They hit close to home, considering his own situation with Harry and what that meant to him. How they had both been so close, and come so far from that time in their lives. He had a hard time seeing how anyone could have Harry so close and then let it get so lost, but in a way he had done that himself. 

“Shit, Haz” He leaned forward on the couch, reaching for his drink as he processed some heavy thoughts. “I just…” He paused to take a drink. “I hope you tell whoever it’s about that it’s their song. I can’t imagine hearing that with that knowledge.” Louis stated, licking his lips as he set the glass down. 

Harry seemed to have a sad expression on his face, no doubt from performing one of the most intense songs Louis had ever heard. “So, tell me about him. Is he worth all this heart stopping, ghostly music?” 

***

Harry felt a combination of things: both on top of the world and like he was going to roll over and die right there. Louis heard the song and thought it was great...but at the same time wanted to know about the person it was about. Harry removed the guitar strap from over his shoulder and set the instrument down.

He let out a sigh. “So he’s really great, most of the time. I just realized I had these feelings for him, that evolved from our friendship…” Harry trailed off, seeing Louis’ facial expression change.

“Oh my god, is it Liam?” Louis asked, mouth dropping.

“Ew, no. Jesus, Louis.” Harry’s response was almost immediate as he pulled a face.

“I mean, I know you guys get really deep into philosophy and shit, and I mean...he’s gay...so.” Louis shrugged, taking a sip of his drink and asking Harry to continue. 

“Right. Well no, it’s not him.”

“Okay who is it then? Promises, promises.” Louis reminded him, giving him a wag of his eyebrows. He was ridiculous. 

Harry groaned. “Yeah, yeah, I know.” He paused. “So you know how you said if someone had a song written about them, they should know?” Harry could hear his heart beating in his ears, skin prickling with a bit of sweat as Louis stared at him, unknowingly, finally giving him a nod.

“Well uh. It’s...it’s about you.”

***

It was, what? Louis was having bit of trouble comprehending what was going on. How could the song possibly be about him? Sure he had blue eyes and was always getting more tattoos, but Harry couldn’t be in love with him - there was no way that would even be a slightest possibility. He had never even said anything close, and the last time he and Harry hung out together alone had to be months ago. There were always other people around, Niall constantly popping in and out, making his presence known. Louis thought that’s when he and Harry’s relationship started to take a turn.

He wanted to speak - to stay something profound or at least helpful for his friend, but all of his words were lost on a tied up tongue. He had at one point snuffed out the idea of ever having someone feel that way about him, let alone his best friend. Louis reached for his drink, taking a long pull from it before replying to Harry’s statement.

***

Harry was going to vomit. He was surely going to puke right there as he watched Louis go through what had to be seventeen emotions in about thirty seconds. For half a moment he thought he saw a smile play on his face, but he couldn’t be sure considering how his friend was acting. He had turned away, taken a sip of alcohol, turned back to him with wide eyes, and hadn’t said a word. Surely this was the end of their friendship. Harry shook his head, knowing he should have never trusted Niall with when and where to tell Louis about this. He leaned his head back, closing his eyes as he let out a low groan.

What he didn’t expect, however, was the next moment feeling the soft press of lips to his own. His hands immediately grasped for the face that was connected to his - and of course it was Louis...but how was it Louis?

***

He hadn’t really thought about it, if he was being honest. Louis just wanted to tell Harry that he wasn’t the only one feeling something about their relationship. The kiss had been a rash choice in how to proceed, but he figured it got the point across. He hovered there for a moment, blue eyes searching green before he closed the space between them once more. Harry nearly melted into the touch, a small sound coming from his throat as Louis pulled away, not wanting to get too heated without knowing how Harry was feeling about it.

Louis leaned back, letting out a low whistle as his thoughts caught up with him. “Wow” he muttered, licking his lips as he stared forward, grabbing his drink once more.

“Wow is right.” Harry responded, voice barely above a whisper.

“Guess Loren was right.” He paused, taking a long pull from his glass as he swirled the liquid within.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked, still staring forward, as shocked as anyone else that Louis would have kissed him. He didn’t imagine that: Louis. Kissed. Harry.

“Loren, my ex?” Louis started. “He was all bent out of shape that I talked a lot about your show and about you in general. Claimed I was too in love with you to keep dating him and blah blah. Bit of an ass at times really.” 

Harry’s head nearly twisted off his neck as he turned to face Louis. “He?” He asked, more surprised at the gender of his ex than anything else he had said. “Loren was a guy this whole time and you’re just mentioning it now?” Harry asked, hand lifting up to his lips and touching the place where Louis’ had just been.

“You didn’t ask.”

“You didn’t offer!”

Louis laughed then, giving Harry a shrug. “You seem much more concerned with Loren than the fact that I just said he was right.”

“Right about what?” Harry was confused. What was going on? Was he having some sort of fever dream?

“Jesus Harry I swear, sometimes you get so wrapped up in that head of yours, you don’t see what’s right in front of you. I was trying to tell you that I’m in love with you.”

“What?” Harry asked, his brain still swimming with Louis’ kiss...and did he just say, was he...serious?

“Say it again.” 

“I’m in love with you.”

At that point Harry didn’t care if he heard him wrong. He didn’t care if he was making one of the biggest mistakes of his life. He didn’t care if he made up that Louis had kissed him before and this was all some messed up prank that was going extremely wrong. He scooted closer to Louis on the couch, eyes stuck together as he leaned forward and connected their lips once more.

***

They had been making out for what seemed like hours. The only interruptions were whispered words of intent and some of love. Louis wasn’t sure how far to take their physical intimacy, but with Harry on top of him, every inch of them connected at this point, he was having trouble holding back. Sure they had just admitted their feelings for one another, but Louis had been holding in feelings for Harry for years. Just when he was about to approach the topic, separating their lips and taking a breath, his phone began to ring.

“Shit.” he muttered, wanting to send it to voicemail, but knowing it was his mum’s ringtone. “Shit, sorry, H.” He stated, reaching over to grab his forgotten about phone, seeing his mum’s face on the screen before he apologized again and answered it. When he did, the only thing he could hear on the other end was singing. His family was singing happy birthday to him, and he was stuck up under Harry, who was currently sporting the goofiest of grins.

“Thanks, you guys.” He paused, his phone still on speakerphone from the singing. “Sorry I can’t be there tonight.” He did feel sad about missing his birthday with his family, especially when it was Christmas the next day.

“Oh love that’s alright - I’m just glad you’re not alone.” Louis gave Harry a look as he moved to sit up, Harry holding back giggles as Louis’ mum continued to talk. “How is our boy Harry, anyway?” 

“I’m really good Jay - great!” Harry shouted from across the couch, Louis rolling his eyes.

“What have you two been up to tonight?”

***

Harry woke up with a start, his phone alarm blaring in his ear. He reached over to turn it off but was met with a warm force - Louis, snoring up against his side. They had fallen asleep in Harry’s bed as they watched a movie, despite both of them most definitely wanting more physically. Harry had played it cool and picked a film, all the while snuggling closer to Louis before they drifted off. Now, though, with Louis’ bare chest pressed against Harry, things were feeling a bit different. He wanted more with him - everything, if he was being honest, and had wanted it for longer than he could remember. He thought that maybe, just maybe, Louis might want that too. He had said the night before that he had loved Harry for quite some time and as he stared at him, he wondered what their future held - if anything at all.

“Why’re you staring at me?” Louis asked in a groggy voice, his eyes still closed as he snuggled closer into Harry.

“Wasn’t.”

“You’ve been staring at me for at least five minutes, love.” He threw his arm around Harry’s midsection, pulling at him to come under the covers with him. “C’mon, let’s go back to sleep.” He murmured.

“We have a train to catch, remember?” Harry asked, letting his arm snake around Louis.

At that Louis opened his eyes, albeit groggily, and reached over to open the curtains. The sun blared through the windows but the snow continued to fall. “Looks like we’re not going anywhere anytime soon.”

Their train ended up being cancelled, the pair spending the day in various states of undress as they wandered around the flat. Harry had managed to cook up some french toast, putting some green sprinkles atop the syrup before setting the plate in front of Louis. “Happy Christmas” He smiled, nudging Louis before scooting up next to him and digging in.

***

After many hours of FIFA, naps, and of course snogging, the pair were finally able to catch a train when the snow let up that evening. They would barely make Christmas dinner at their respective homes, but that really wasn’t much of a concern to either of them

At the train station, Louis stopped Harry once they were inside. “When are you headed back to Uni?” He asked, slipping off his beanie and running a hand through his hair. Their break was a few weeks long, but Louis wasn’t sure after so much uninterrupted time together that he would be able to be apart for that length of time.

“I was going to head back a bit after the new year. No official plans yet.” Harry paused, glancing down at his phone when a text from his mum came in, stating she’d be there in a few minutes. “You gonna miss me?”

“Shut it, you knob. But yes, if you must know.”

“Do you have any plans for New Years Eve?” 

Louis paused. He had told some mates that he was throwing a party at their flat - invited the other guys and all, but hadn’t extended the invite to Harry. “Come back to Uni with me. I was planning on having some people over, but...I mean, I just want time with you is all.”

Harry leaned in, planting a kiss on Louis’ cheek just as he spotted his mum’s car outside. “I’ll be there.” He smiled, giving Louis a small smile before heading outside to be met with his mum’s open arms.

***

The next few days dragged on like molasses for Louis. Sure he loved spending time with his family and celebrating the holiday, but having a bit of Harry and then losing him - even if just for a handful of days - was the cruelest. Of course they had exchanged texts, mostly at night when Louis wasn’t bogged down with several children, but it wasn’t the same.

One particularly gloomy day a few days after Christmas, Louis heard a bit of a commotion downstairs - his siblings screeching and the front door opening. He was over having company and having to entertain at all hours. Louis opened his bedroom door, calling down the stairs for them to be quiet and the noise dulled down. About an hour later Louis was hungry enough to feed himself, and desperately needed tea. What he did not expect when he came down in only his pajama pants was to see Harry playing board games with the rest of his family.

“What’re you…” he trailed off, eyes scanning the table of his siblings who were actually behaving for once, Jay with a smile on her face.

“You were a bit grumpy when Harry came over, so we decided to let you rest.” She stated. “Tea’s on in the kitchen.” She added.

Louis looked from Harry to his mum, a certain sort of secret hanging between them. 

He shuffled to the kitchen and prepared his tea before pulling up a seat at the table. “Any special reason for your visit?” Louis asked, wanting to get his hands all over Harry, but instead settling them around his mug.

“Came over to see if you wanted to train back to Uni tomorrow, but Mr. Grumpy Gus over here didn’t seem to want company.” Lottie laughed at that, muttering something to herself.

“So you’ve all just been playing games without me, then?”

“We’re catching up.” Jay stated, smiling at Harry. “It’s been far too long since H has popped by, I was beginning to think something had changed.”

Harry and Louis exchanged a look, knowing that something definitely had, and for the better.

****

The next day was spent in a familiar fashion: getting a ride to the train, going back to Uni with one another, and spending very limited time doing anything else than snogging. Harry’s head was swimming with feelings of  _ more more more _ so when Louis suddenly stopped the kissing, hands on Harry’s bare chest, he was surprised.

“Harry.” he breathed.

“That’s me.”

“Shut up.” Louis scolded.

“Why aren’t we kissing anymore?” Harry got straight to the point, his long hair loose around his face as he leaned over Louis. The blue eyes that stared back at him had blown pupils and a searching stare.

“Do you...well...I want more - you.” Louis babbled, not making much sense until Harry was able to string together a sentence for him.

“My room?” Harry asked, as they were now situated on the couch in the common area.

“Please.”

***

The door to the flat closed just as Harry took a warm flannel and wiped them down. He and Louis had spent what felt like years exploring one another, and it had been nothing short of wonderful. It seemed that their time was cut short by Niall’s early arrival.

Louis planted a kiss on Harry’s lips, before getting up from the bed and slipping his pants on. “Best confront Mr. Curious.” He winked, hearing Niall move around in the main room.

He stepped out, immediately met with a deluge of questions before Niall finally stopped. “I mean I’m not wondering what happened because fuck, mate, I had to wait another hour before I could come in here - you all are very...expressive.” He laughed, clapping Louis on the shoulder. 

“Christ you heard?” 

“Hard not to - think the whole dorm would have, save for it being hols and all.” He shook his head, telling Louis it wasn’t a huge deal. “I’m happy for you, mate.” He smiled, glancing behind Louis as Harry emerged from his bedroom. 

“Niall, how was your Christmas?” He asked.

“Definitely not as good as the last hour or so that you had.” He laughed, causing Harry to blush fiercely.

Harry looked between Niall and Louis before shaking his head and beginning the work on cleaning up the place for the party. The trio cleaned as much as they could, making sure everything had it’s home before their friends started flooding the place. Liam and Zayn were some of the last to arrive, hair tousled and pinks cheek as they greeted their other flatmates. 

“Is everyone getting laid except for me?” Niall asked to the room, taking a long pull from his beer.

***

Three minutes to midnight, Harry found Louis, snaking his arms around the smaller man and bringing him in close. He rubbed his nose against Louis’ cheek, inhaling everything about him as they stood at the window, waiting to see the fireworks that were being blown off only a few miles away.

“I’m glad we didn’t end the year the same way we started it.” Harry murmured, breaking the pensive silence between them.

Louis turned around in Harry’s arms, adjusting himself to look up. “We were idiots, huh?”

Harry nodded, a smile growing on his face as he watched Louis. “Could’ve been doing this for years.” 

“What’s that?”

The clock struck midnight and Harry leaned in with purposes, planting his lips over Louis’ for the best New Year to date.

 

 

 

 

The end.


End file.
